not so much love for big love

When I tell people I'm from Utah there is one follow up question that is by far not my favorite."OMG. Have you seen Big Love?"The answer is no! Nor do I care to. No it is not like that in Utah. I don't know any polygamists. I have never seen one at my church. There aren't secret ones roaming around everywhere. etc. etc.The best part is when they correct me and tell me that it really is like that in Utah. I'm sure they would know better. I've only been a devout member my entire life. But what do I know about my religion and hometown?

{ you are beautiful }

The other day I was in a conversation with some of my closest friends at hair school and they began to ask me how I got so good at being positive about myself. They wanted to know how I was able to not pick myself apart in the mirror each day, or compare myself to every girl my eyes came across. At first I just sort of laughed and probably said something sarcastic, but they pressed further and honestly wanted to know. They told me they couldn't even imagine how it would feel to not care or think about how everyone saw them. I know how they feel because I used to be there too. I think most girls have been and a lot still are.
I didn't have an easy answer for my friends then, and I'm not sure I still do, but overall I'd say for me it takes practice, gratitude, and acknowledging who i am.

It takes practice to be kind to yourself. You have power over your words and if you control your words you can begin to control your thoughts. It is as simple as not saying critical things about yourself. Really it is possible. When you want to say something negative about yourself just stop and find something positive to say instead. This is one that takes continual practice.

Gratitude is key to loving all of yourself. It will stop you from being your worst critic. When you realize just how fortunate you are to have the body,abilities,and health that you have, you would feel silly to complain about such trivial things like as a few extra dimples in your behind.

The biggest and most powerful thing is recognizing that you are a child of God. He created you. He loves you perfectly. He sees you as a beautiful daughter with so many talents and wonderful attributes. To waste energy on unrealistic expectations and harsh comparisons wouldn't make him proud, it would make him sad. He wants to see you happy. Start to see yourself for who you really are, and what you are capable of doing, and forget everything else.

I am definitely not perfect at this, and I don't claim to be. But I am around so many beautiful people each day that just don't see it. They beat themselves up over the tiniest details. I've heard them say they hate parts of their bodies I didn't even know I had. It just makes me sad to see such beautiful women waste so much energy worrying about these trivial things.
So let's all just stop the madness and love ourselves completely.
We are all beautiful.

As I was driving home from school, the car that was two cars in front of me had an issue. Its tire fell off. The whole tire went rolling down the freeway without the car. It was bizarre. It wasn't shredded or anything it just came off and went rolling. Luckily it didn't cause an accident. I had no idea tires could do that.

better at updates.

I'm going to make more day to day updates starting now.
Jared started finals.
This means I get to entertain myself while he studies hard. Actually, I've pretty much been doing this all year thanks to Law Review. :)
I made molten lava cake and ice cream tonight.
It was pretty delicious.
School is great. I feel so lucky to be doing something I love.
I love the people I get to spend my days with at school.
I love making people feel beautiful, and talking with strangers usually makes for a good time.
I only have about 2 months left and honestly I will miss school, but I can't wait to go see my family and spend my Saturdays with Jared. That will be awesome.
Oh and it is finally above freezing in Chicago! It has been in the 40's and I am loving it. It's been rainy, but that's great because it means it is too warm for snow!
Life is just really good. No complaints.
i love these pictures.